Personal space
by royalapple
Summary: He had it thought out. He will go there, do his job and go home. How will the professional, detached interpreter that Sasuke Uchiha is behave when faced with people thinking his personal space is something to play with? AU, modern times, eventual NaruSasu
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. Master Kishimoto does.

_A/N: This is alternate universe fanfiction. I placed them in very modern enviroment. This is eventual boy on boy/slash/yaoi story, so you have been warned. If you already feel disturbed, please leave now (altough there's no yaoi stuff in first chapter)._  
_Reviews are always appreciated._

"Don't go yet, brother!" Sasuke knew he should remember something, but no matter how much he struggled, he couldn't find it in his head. "Brother!" he called one more time as he run after his brother. "I have to…"

"_Vena saphena_" said Itachi turning to face Sasuke, who only looked confused by the answer. "The word you're looking for, foolish little brother, is…" explained Itachi, but Sasuke couldn't hear his words anymore – the only thing he could hear was loud, beeping sound. Standing disoriented and alone in the middle of the street, he looked around trying to place where the sound was coming from. He looked down at his wrist and found himself staring at his watch not in the street anymore, but in his dark, unlit bedroom, where on the night stand laid the offensive piece. Sasuke silenced the watch and lit his night light, to see what ungodly hour was that. The hour hand was on the digit with round bottom and curved upper and the minute hand was straight to the roof. Sasuke tried to focus and gather his thought in some form of order.

"Kill me" muttered under his breath as his slung his legs off the bed, straightened the covers out of habit and dragged himself to the kitchen to start coffee machine and then to the bathroom for his morning routine. Every time he had to wake up so early, he was glad his face didn't have a lot of hair and it was growing very slowly, so he could shave in the evening and not bother with it for two to three days. Showered and half-dressed Sasuke went to the kitchen to pour himself his first cup of life giving liquid, all the while towelling his now only damp hair. Sasuke cringed inwardly at the thought of eating this early, but he knew he would not have time to eat anything sustaining for long hours, so he started the mini oven and made himself a toast with camembert on the olive and dried tomatoes bun with a touch of olive oil. The fact, that eating so early in the morning was revolting, didn't mean he couldn't at least eat something nice. Washing down the toast with another cup of coffee Sasuke cleaned up after his quick breakfast and went back to the bedroom to find his shirt and jacket. He looked at his hair and tried to comb it down in everyday futile attempt to force it down – he knew he'll fail, but Sasuke kept trying anyways, knowing the only thing that could prevent his sticking up hair is growing it long, and that was unacceptable because of his resemblance to Itachi.

Looking around his apartment once more Sasuke got his case, car keys and left. While driving to his work his thoughts went back to the strange end of his dream. He dreamed about Itachi leaving him often enough to not let it bother him anymore. But the thing Itachi said to him was _vena saphena_ – saphenous vein, the one that goes behind of the knee. That was one of last words Sasuke read the prior evening while revising his new vocabulary for the job. Since his college days Sasuke rarely had dreams laced with words he was learning. To be fair, ever since he graduated philology course, he rarely had to cram a lot of new vocabulary – now usually it was a word or two he wasn't perfectly sure about. The learning part was major reason he took the job as consecutive interpreter on weekend osteopathy classes. Written translations tend to be boring affair, and being a nice interpreting accessory at the meeting, be them official, business or social, was simple annoying. He studied carefully given materials, so Sasuke was certain he'll do impeccable translation. The only thing he was not so sure was meeting a lot a new people in one go – students for whom he'll be translating, teachers – and it turned out in his weekend he'll translate at least four different people. He hoped they had nice accents and speak in coherent, ordered manner.

By the time he got to the school building he went through nervousness due to fear of accents of the teachers, calmness due to his will force and slightly anxious due to having to meet so many new people.

After entering the building he asked the secretary in the main lobby for direction. The young, strawberry blonde girl, Moegi as her name tag informed, looked up from her screen and stared at him. After a moment Sasuke cleared his throat to remind her that he wanted something from her.

"The direction to the school president's office, Miss?"

"Ah, yes, I'm sorry – you have to go through the corridor on the right, then the stairs up. The chairman office will be in the second floor at the end of corridor on the right." She threw her answer on one breath, more than slightly embarrassed being caught gaping. Sasuke thanked for her help and while he went as pointed, he had a feeling she was still ogling him. That kind of behaviour was one of the reasons he didn't like to go outside of his apartment much. Getting with no trouble to the right wing of the building, he passed few groups of people happily chatting around. It seemed they were catching up after holidays, and as most of them had their suitcases with them, they lived not in the close vicinity of the city.

That's good, thought Sasuke, I will not see them anywhere between the weekends when they have classes. As he kept moving some of the more outgoing people, mostly women, asked him whether he's new interpreter and after confirming, that yes, he is the new interpreter, he was repeatedly asked for which year he will be translating. His answer, apparently, was not what they expected, so he heard many disappointed sighs. He couldn't be more glad he was going to translate for the first years – from experience Sasuke knew freshman are more subdued than the rest of students, so he hoped "his" students will leave him as alone as possible.

Finally, after answering what seemed countless questions, he reached the president's office. The door was opened widely and Sasuke was soon greeted with a warm, bear hug from hugely built older man with long, white hair.

"You must be Sasuke Uchiha, our new interpreter!" said the man letting Sasuke go and allowing him to breathe once again. Nodding in agreement Sasuke extended his hand and soon he regretted his gesture – the man gave him most crushing hand shake Sasuke even felt in his life. "I'm Jiraiya Sannin, the president and chairman of the school, but please call me just Jiraiya. I'll introduce you to other teachers in a minute." Having said all that Sasuke watched as the man delegate some things to his assistant in what seemed to be very melodious German – Sasuke was betting it was Dutch. So the guy was in all probability Dutch, but his English, from what Sasuke heard, had nice accent – not too heavy and definitely not overly stiff.

The assistant was younger than Jiraiya, but older than Sasuke and had longish brown hair in a small ponytail. The guy nodded to whatever Jiraiya was saying, smiled at Sasuke and went do to his thing. By the time Jiraiya was ready to show Sasuke around, silvery haired guy in a mask barged into the office. He didn't acknowledge Sasuke there, instead started talking in that same melodious language as Jiraiya earlier. He got interrupted by the president in the Dutch, and then switched to English.

"Kakashi, I'd like to introduce Sasuke Uchiha, our new interpreter for first year. Sasuke, this is Kakashi Hatake and he'll be teaching techniques on practical classes."

Kakashi absentmindedly extended his hand and shook Sasuke's, but was already talking to Jiraiya, luckily for Sasuke in English. "Jiraiya, I told you having me as a practical class teacher is a bad idea, but what possessed you to give me Guy as an assistant?! Do you hate those poor bastards that much?"

"Kakashi, you're overreacting. It's not like you to be that emotional about anything." said Jiraiya with a sparkle in his eyes. "Well, except for my books of course." The man added with a wink. "Oh and here's Temari, she's the interpreter for the second year. Temari, this is Sasuke, he'll be translating for the first years. Now excuse me, kids." And with that last sentence Jiraiya was gone.

"I see" said Temari extending her hand and shaking Sasuke's. "Do you live nearby? If you need place to stay, you can stay at mine's." said the other translator, reluctantly letting his hand go.

"Thank you for the offer, but I live in the city, therefore there's no need to impose on you." This day was as bad as Sasuke feared. He was in the building for ten minutes and at least four women have hit on him and one even invited him to stay a night. Sometimes Sasuke wished he was more like his brother, who dealt with all the unwanted attention giving away his downright evil aura. Sasuke's cold detachment wasn't doing the trick anymore. Well, thought bitterly Sasuke, not now, and not ever.

Checking his watch and seeing he had only few minutes before opening lecture would be given, Sasuke asked Temari who will give the lecture.

"I believe it would be Tsunade or Jiraiya. Would you like to translate the lecture, or you'd rather have me or Shizune do it?"

Sasuke thought about it for a moment, and decided he'd like to listen first. He doesn't really need to warm his English for translating. "If you don't mind, I'd rather listen first to the teachers."

Temari smiled at him and nodded. "Then let me find Shizune and drop this pleasant news on her. Then we could talk a bit more before first real session." As she went away Sasuke looked into nearest classroom, where most of the students have already gathered, and the rest was walking up and down the hall. Sasuke couldn't wait for the session to begin – the faster they start, the faster the day will be over. As he was going into the class where the opening lecture will take place he was joined by Temari with some woman few years older than Sasuke. "This is Shizune, she'll do the opening talk." and with that she grabbed Sasuke's hand and dragged him into the back rows of the room. "Are you physiotherapist? "

"No, I'm regular philologist. What about you? Or Shizune, for that matter?"

"She's a physiotherapist, but I am just like you, philologist. Which one have you done? English, some other?" asked Temari, still watching around, as she was looking for someone.

"I've done English, French and German philology when I was at university. I've done Spanish as postgraduate."

"All of them in four years? I'm impressed." said Temari. Sasuke didn't find the need to tell her he lived in most of those countries at least for 3 years, so he knew the languages and history, so the only thing he needed to learn for his courses was literature, which he found rather interesting. "There's Tsunade at the front – the woman with blonde hair. If you're translating her, be careful not to stand too close, otherwise she'll be using you as her model for pathologies. And she's not overly gentle. Next to her is Jiraiya, he makes almost all his references and analogies based on sex – he says it's easier for the students to remember when topics are related to sex, but I think he's just a pervert. Shizune has very hard time translating him as she's not that comfortable with his sex jokes. Who else there is... There's Kakashi, I don't really know which course he'll teach this year – normally is something theoretical, so he won't have to walk or do too much."

"I met Kakashi already, and he said something about practical class and his assistant, Guy I think he was called" supplied Sasuke.

"Practical classes? And with Guy? Are you sure?" Why she was that shocked, Sasuke couldn't tell. Surely the man was a physiotherapist as well, so why it would be so bad for him to teach practical class? "Last year Kakashi covered neurology" continued Temari after a moment. By this time the opening lecture had started and Tsunade introduced herself and the teachers that were with her. Now she was starting to tell about the school and principles of osteopathy. "Well, to say it was boring as hell it's an understatement of the year. And Guy was doing the nutrition classes – he turned the driest material into some weird form of competition. Whoever lost in many of the "tests" had to do sit-ups or squats or push-ups. He's just crazy."

While Temari was incessantly talking, Sasuke took his time to watch every teacher in the room and then he looked around students. All of them were adults, and as this was postgraduate thing, they had to be at least twenty-three. Most of them was Sasuke's age and older. Tsunade was now talking about very basic biochemistry of human body and how everything is regulated by few compounds in the blood and cells. As she was about to sum up her short speech, the door to classroom opened slightly and Sasuke saw just a glimpse of mop of bright blonde hair before Tsunade halted her speech and dragged the man inside. "He's the brat I was talking earlier about." said Tsunade while keeping him steady in place by her even from a distance not so gentle hold of his ear. "This is Naruto Uzumaki, and he'll be covering anatomy and palpation." The said man smiled sheepishly and waved his hand in the general direction of the audience. "What was I saying?" The lecturer resumed her speech again, all the while keeping Naruto's ear in steel grip. "I forgot because of you, you brat. Then I'll just introduce the interpreter for the first year – Sasuke Uchiha, come forward, Sasuke!"

Not happy about having to go all the way to the front, yet obliged to comply Sasuke went and bowed slightly before the audience. He thought he saw the Naruto guy smile at him and wave a bit, but then the man was seized by another powerful grip on his ear. With one more sentence from Tsunade, they were free for next hour or so before next session will start.

- I wish you a very good year and see you in class. Dismissed!

A/N: I hope you enjoyed it. See you next time.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: This is second chapter of the story. I can't estimate how many will be in the end. I hope you'll like this one!_

If Sasuke thought the morning was bad, he could not foresee what Lady Luck planned for him. The first class to translate was biomechanics with Jiraiya. As Sasuke observed earlier, the man had quite nice accent, so he didn't have any troubles understanding what was said.

He was talking about quite interesting subject, so Sasuke wasn't only half listening for his brain to accommodate the words and then let them out in another language. He was now quite deeply engaged in the topic, all the while keeping his impeccable translation going. Jiraiya was now talking how to alleviate someone's pain, for example in the leg, by rubbing and massaging the sore lumbar spine joints. He talked how osteopathy was a holistic approach that could make the pain in the leg go away simply by restoring order of tissue and bodily fluids in the vertebral discs, or how the osteopaths could treat pain with some soft tissue technique done on visceral organs. Or how to treat mild migraine by having sex – as the blood flow increases, the muscles and nerves get more oxygen and nutrition, so they are more relaxed and don't hurt so much. Not to mention the endorphins – happy drug of the body.

After about an hour and a half of talking about basic principles and rules of biomechanics, Jiraiya proceeded to explain the student body, why is it so important to hold close your patient. To demonstrate his theory, Jiraiya went to the plastic skeleton in the corner of the class, pushed him in the middle and waved it's hand to the students, stating his – the skeleton's – name is Ahmed, with the stress on the "h" part of his name. Then Jiraiya tried to make the skeleton raise its hand by poking it and telling it what he wanted it to do. When that didn't make the Ahmed to do what was asked, Jiraiya then shoved it back into the corner with an "uncooperative brat" grunt and, flashing his audience mischievous grin, he grabbed Sasuke's hand and pulled him into tight embrace.

Before Sasuke had any chance to react, he found himself fully pressed against Jiraiya, who, as slightly dazed Sasuke noted, kept iron grip on his palm and, furthermore, sneaked his other arm behind Sasuke's lower back, decisively holding him in position. Dance position – supplied dimly Sasuke's brain, striking with terror already confused interpreter. Before Sasuke had any chance of escaping, he felt himself moved. Haven't Jiraiya heard about personal space?

"With osteopathy is like with dancing," Jiraiya began his explanation. The professional part of Sasuke's brain kept swift translation, even when the rest of his brain was busy comprehending how he got into this position and calculating the fastest escape route.

"If you hold your partner firm enough and in the right way, you can move her, or as in this lovely example – him," joked Jiraiya flashing the student body toothy grin before continuing "in any direction you want. You want your partner go left..."

At this point Sasuke felt himself moving to the left, trying to free his precious body from this strange touchy-feely bear-like man to no avail. Sasuke could swear he heard some of the students snicker at his fate.

"You want your partner go to the right..." Again Sasuke, unable to be still under Jiraiya's force, felt himself dance to the right. By this very moment most of the students were grinning openly.

"And with enough assertiveness you can even dip your partner." And with only that as a form of a warning, Sasuke felt himself being held under his back and bent backwards, swaying in small arc as Jiraiya controlled his movements. Sasuke could swear this class could not go any worse. Not until he heard catcalls from the students. Now he wanted to just die in embarrassment.

Not releasing Sasuke just yet, Jiraiya went on. "And that's how the cookie crumbles." After saying that Jiraiya made Sasuke do a spin turn and finally let go of him. Winking mischievously at the students, added. "See you all next time. Class dismissed!"

To say Sasuke was glad Jiraiya's classes were over was an understatement of the day. He just prayed to whichever deity was currently listening to him, that this type of demonstration was peculiar just to this weird guy.

After recovering from his first interpreting experience with Jiraiya, Sasuke got out his schedule to check who was next on his list. It dawned with some unrelenting horror it could be Jiraiya once more, what made his hands shake a bit and fumble with folded piece of paper more. Fortunately for him, next was Tsunade, the only female teacher as far as he knew. That girl, Temari, said something about her, but after being forced to dance with Jiraiya, he couldn't remember what that was.

* * *

After his ten minute break Sasuke was standing in another room but with the same snickering students as before, and with Tsunade watching carefully as students gathered in the classroom sitting behind her desk. Sasuke turned to the windowsill for his cup of water, and then glanced at his watch wishing this class to be over as soon as possible. After this one there was lunch break, so would have at least an hour to rest. He couldn't believe how tired he already was.

He was so deep in thought he didn't notice as Tsunade moved from behind her desk to stand just right next to him.

"Who can tell me what's wrong with our patient here?" asked very loudly Tsunade poking not gentle at all at Sasuke's side to make him stand straight. He automatically responded by translating whatever she said, and as no students seemed to be brave enough to answer her, Sasuke had a second to ponder what she was talking about. Am I slouching? Asked Sasuke himself. Uchihas do not slouch, that's for sure. And to make himself even more confident, that indeed there was nothing wrong with his posture, he tried to stand just a little more straight.

"I'll tell you then," Tsunade resumed her speech as no one dared to even whimper anything. "His lumbar spine is in full lordosis, even in more than full, as he tries to look oh-so-nicely and tall." And with than accusation, or maybe a diagnosis, Sasuke felt being held by shoulders to make him arch his lower back a little. While he did not enjoyed being manhandled like that, he had to admit that giving a rest to his lower back was very pain relieving. But he wouldn't slouch – Uchihas did not slouch – so as soon as his shoulders were left alone, he tried to push his lumbar spine in previous position. Pain be damned, what would his family said if they saw him like that?

"Human body was not made to be standing or sitting still with fully erected spine for periods of time no longer than few minutes at most. I know you tell your patients to sit and stand and walk with completely straight backs, but I can see how most of you sit right now. And that's with flexed lumbar spines." Saying that she eyed every single one of the students, making them uncomfortable with being caught on hypocrisy, yet they mostly remained in same position apparently to Tsunade's approval.

"Who tells their patients to sit and stand straight? Raise of hands, don't be shy." She asked taking few steps into corner of the room where folded chairs were stashed. While students reluctantly showed their hands in the air, she took one, opened and put it just behind Sasuke's legs.

"Very good. Now I want each and every person who raised their hand to sit straight, just like you keep telling your patients, until the end of this class. I'd like to see how many of you will have mild to severe back pain in fifteen minutes, not to mention an hour and a half. Just for the incentive to sit in this oh-so-comfortable position – as you're sitting in pairs at the desks, you can smack your partner every time he or she bends their lumbar spine." Hearing small sounds of groaning from the students she half smiled and turned to Sasuke. "And will you sit down already? I can't watch you twist your hips to compensate for hurting your lumbar spine."

Sasuke wanted to argue, but before he could utter anything he was pushed quite forcibly on the chair. He briefly wondered how this rather slim woman had this much force in her hands. His confusion had to be visible on his face, as he got smacked almost lightly on the head with short "don't argue with me, brat".

Rest of the class went without much trouble, if Sasuke was willing to not count being used as a model every time Tsunade was talking about some pathology or another, asked students what would be good sign to look for in that particular problem, and use Sasuke each time they said something stupid.

Like the time someone wanted to look coxarthrosis in the finger joints. So she took Sasuke by hand and dragged him to his feet to the middle of the room showing his hand high in the air for everyone to see. Her other hand gripped tightly his right hip.

"How could arhtrosis of the hip joint travel all the way up to his hand? I know they are linked, as the hand is not completely separated from his pelvis, but pray tell me how this wear and tear damage from walking, running, climbing trees went so far from hip bone?"

As she heard no answer, she went on still not letting go of his hand, although she had freed his probably bruised hip. "Where you went wrong with this one is where you have mistaken coxarthrosis with rheumatoid arthritis – the systematic disease which attacks all joints, starting with finger joints."

As to show them what rheumatoid arthrosis does to finger joints, she pressed her palm on his hand and bent her fingers almost across of his.

"The shape of his joints and fingers overall is before the onset of the rheumatoid arthrosis, and mine when the disease is so far it affects hip joint, which is the last joint to attack."

At this moment Sasuke was just glad she didn't want to bend his fingers in strange directions just to show them this pathology. Not that he was feeling safe for the remainder of the class.

Although in the end he couldn't say she had hurt him in any way or form. She mostly made him walk in weird ways few times and bend his spine in peculiar directions. Nonetheless Sasuke was only counting minutes before finishing this class.

With five minutes to go he remembered what Temari told him about Tsunade – don't stand too close to her, otherwise she'll use you as her model.

Now he was sure he will never forget to not to get too close to this scary woman.

* * *

When Tsunade's classes finished Sasuke was glad due to two major reasons. Firstly, he finally had his much needed break, especially from this weird people that seemed not to notice people's personal space, and secondly he was starving. It wasn't as he was never hungry, because when he was working each and every bodily function tended to be forgotten or neglected. Or both. Yet it was very rare for Sasuke to hear his empty stomach.

That's why he felt sudden appreciation his contract covered catering for interpreters.

After leaving Tsunade's classroom he saw Shizune going his way. He really was hungry and being his regular antisocial self wasn't going to help him here, so what the hell, he looked at the girl and asked

"Could you tell me where the interpreters are meeting for lunch, if, of course, we do such a thing?"

"Yes, we usually gather in room B for the lunch." She answered looking around. "Have you seen Iruka?"

"I'm not sure I know who he is. Is he one of the teachers?"

"Ah, no, he's Jiraiya's… let's say he's Jiraiya's assistant. Brown highly tied hair, tanned skin?"

Sasuke did remember him now, but no, he hasn't seen the man since their brief meeting this morning. Simple shake of his head conveyed his message and Shizune was on her way again.

Following his new intelligence, Sasuke headed to room B for his lunch. As he sat there next to Temari he wondered briefly what was catered for the meal anyway, but as he had no real knowledge to base his assumption, he decided on patience.

Not so long after he got there the blond mop of hair sat opposite to Sasuke.

"Hi Sasuke, I'm Naruto – I'm sure we'll have great time working together!"

"Hello," greeted Sasuke. "How do you know my name?"

"Well, Granny introduced you at the end of her speech, that for one, and for the other – don't want to sound weird or anything, but you're the talk of the hall," explained Naruto with faintly amused look in his eye. Sasuke had the impression he wanted to say something more, but then Naruto's mobile run off. With quick "sorry" the blond was out of the room.

"So," started Temari "how were your first two classes?"

"Fine, I guess."

"Who had you had?" The girl seemed not really bothered by his scarce reply.

Internally Sasuke sighed heavily. He knew he was easily irritated at the best of times, downright pissed when he wasn't in generous mood. Why wasn't she satisfied with his first answer? Was she trying to dig some of his embarrassment out of him? She probably heard some comments on the corridor, just like that Naruto guy. Usually Sasuke wasn't some paranoid freak, but then again usually his day doesn't comprise so much awkwardness as this one. Normally his antisocial attitude wouldn't allow him to care in the slightest what other people thought of him, but today was not normal day, if the treatment from Jiraiya and Tsunade was anything to go by.

"Jiraiya and then Tsunade." By now Sasuke really, almost desperately, hoped the food will arrive soon, so he wouldn't have to entertain this girl next to him. He was tired, hungry and, above all, embarrassed and confused after only four hours of dealing with people that considered concept of personal space some strange whim. He hasn't been touched as much in last year as he was this morning. He wondered whether he had at least the same amount of skin and body contact with his previous lovers like with the two older teachers. After consideration he didn't want to know the answer.

As wished for, something arrived soon, just not the food Sasuke was hoping it would be. Naruto came back with agitated air around him. As he sat down on his previous spot, he rubbed nervously back of his head.

"Sorry about that. Does any of you happen to know any hotels in the close vicinity? Or any other places to stay?"

"No, not really, Naruto. Something happen with your booked accommodations?" asked concerned Temari, shifting her attention and turning to Naruto. At least she was out of Sasuke's hair. Not that she bothered him so much, but Sasuke was close to some form of fit due to lack of respect for his personal space or being embarrassed out of his head. Or both.

"Ah, well, you see, there was some misunderstanding at the hotel about number of people in our group, and they reserved one room less than needed."

"So why don't you just book yourself another room in that establishment?" asked Sasuke, not really believing he did it. Why the hell would he be helping some idiot who can't even successfully book himself a room in a foreign country?

"You see, there's the thing – they don't have more rooms in there for this weekend." When Sasuke graced him with sceptical look, Naruto explained further. "They said something about having wedding reception there and a lot of guests are staying for the weekend. So many in fact, they can't even offer a spare, folding bed."

"Oh, I'm sorry, Naruto. I wish I had a sofa or spare bed I could offer you," said Temari apologetically.

"No, really, Temari, it's all swell. Don't mind me, I'll manage something." Sasuke could see how not swell Naruto was looking, but Temari seemed to take his words at their value.

"You can stay at my place, if you want," offered Sasuke gaining three disbelieving looks – two from his companions, and one internal from himself. What the hell possessed him to say something like that? He didn't like the guy, even thought of him very little after not getting room to sleep stunt.

"Are you serious?" Ha, see? – Sasuke thought to himself – even Naruto had difficult time to believe you. Now just back off with something neutral to say, said sane, suddenly not tired, antisocial part of Sasuke's brain.

"Yes, why not. You could sleep on the couch." That wasn't supposed to came out like that. Damn it!

"Thanks, Sasuke. That's really nice of you! I'm sure we'll be awesome flatmates for the weekend." Naruto seemed genuinely happy about this situation, but before Sasuke had the opportunity to voice his concern regarding his makeshift predicament, the food arrived and whatever was on Sasuke's mind was temporarily forgotten.

"Oh yeah, pasta carbonara and ramen," exclaimed happily Naruto. "Oh, and soda. Carbohydrates with carbohydrates on top of sugar. With touch of more sugar. Boy, gotta thank Iruka for this feast."

Somehow Sasuke's hunger seemed less important now than berating himself. What the hell he just got himself into? Next thing you know will be that this sugar addict is snoring…

Being hungry and tired always made Sasuke say stupid things. That's why he usually stayed silent and avoided people like plague – then he had very few occasions to blurt something he would regret. And he had a feeling, he hadn't yet grasped the whole range of his regret.

_A/N: Thanks for your time to read this. I do hope you enjoyed Sasuke's little trouble here. Don't forget to leave a review._


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N: As a side note – although it's not my cup of tea, I don't have anything in particular against MPreg stories (this is not one of them, don't worry!), so please don't be mad at me. I just thought this would be undoubtedly fitting here. And yes, the experiment was very real and very true. If you want some more detail, please feel free to PM me._

* * *

Sasuke was proud man. He would not scurry like some lowly rat. He will sit there and pretend he didn't do anything stupid to have his mind in turmoil.

Sasuke was proud man. Proud enough to not swallow his lunch in as much as few bites, but to eat slowly and meticulously, chewing thoroughly each mouthful of food.

He went as far as to register all the tastes. The sweetness of cherry tomatoes, the slightly nutty arugula, the creamy texture of mozzarella cheese of his salad; the delicate chicken with thyme and rosemary. All of this seemed well balanced on his palate. The sparkling water cleaned his mouth nicely throughout the meal. Yes, the lunch was definitely enjoyable.

Or would be, if Sasuke's mind wouldn't berate him constantly about his uncanny invitation for Naruto to share his apartment for the weekend. Or if Naruto would be quiet for even minute amount of time for Sasuke to reorder his scattered thoughts.

During the meal Naruto was animatedly chattering how they will spend their evening. He was deliberating with Jiraiya, who shown up sometime after the lunch was brought, between watching TV and having a little heart to heart with Sasuke to get to know each other. At some point he was even considering going to sleep early, but quickly discarded the idea as "boring". A few futile attempts to engage Sasuke in conversation, in Sasuke's opinion, should have tempered Naruto's flow of words, but it seemed the man could entertain himself just talking out loud. And apparently he was absolutely unfazed by lack of any interaction from Sasuke.

As Naruto's words were running in strong, wide currents, Sasuke was concentrating on his newfound mantra, which, basically, was a reminder to not kill certain blond chatterbox sitting across from him. Sasuke was fairly sure neither Jiraiya nor Tsunade would appreciate having their young teacher dead.

Having finished his meal and being exceedingly done with keeping straight face, Sasuke excused himself from his dining partners. He still had around half of an hour before next class will begin, therefore Sasuke retracted his steps from early morning to the parking lot.

Once outside Sasuke inhaled deeply. The warm, autumn air still had faint scent of sun warmed earth.

Although he would never admit it out loud, Sasuke was more of a spring person – he loved the delightful air vaguely smelling of earth and something very fresh at the same time, the bright colour of greenery around as nature was once again stirring to life.

And, most of all, Sasuke was enamoured with clear, vivid blue sky. The autumn sky, cloudy and greyish at best, wasn't helping his naturally dreary and sombre mood.

Feeling his mind calming, Sasuke closed his eyes and allowed his thoughts to wander. He imagined sitting on a tree branch, with his back against the hard, rough surface of trunk, hidden from view by the foliage. He remembered how serene he felt while sitting there and watching sun bathed clearing. The sharp contrasts between bright yellow of the sun, brilliant blue of the sky and rich green of the tree tops.

Then was the smell – the odd combination of crisp, cold wind and warm, earthy aroma of sandalwood and fresh smell of cedar. As relaxed as the scent made him, Sasuke was dimly aware this particular fragrance was not part of his memory.

Sasuke wasn't sure whether he opened his eyes or not, because right now he was staring into impossibly brilliant blue depth in front of him.

"I love being outside, too."

Sasuke barely registered that the voice, just slightly louder than a whisper, wasn't his. Jerking fully awake he stepped back a little, so he wouldn't be that close to the owner of that blue eyes he was caught gaping into.

He felt his face flush. Sasuke knew that with his pale complexion every blush became furious. He wasn't sure what to say, and as he already made fool out of himself speaking without properly thinking it through, Sasuke decided staying quiet was best course of action. Also, he noted with relief, Naruto wasn't even looking at him, having closed his eyes and raised his nose to apparently smell the autumn air and being content to relish in absorbing the nature around him in silence.

Watching Naruto he found himself wondering about age of the man in front of him. When talking animatedly and lively gesticulating, Naruto seemed roughly his age of twenty-seven. When standing still, enwrapped in nature around him he looked much younger, maybe in early twenties. It was quite fascinating how much could one change in a matter of minutes.

As Sasuke was conjecturing Naruto's age, the man in question opened his eyes and flashed Sasuke his wide, boyish smile. Sasuke, feeling much better than before exiting the building, checked time on his watch.

"We should start heading back. The class will begin in less than eight minutes."

"Yeah, I guess," answered quietly Naruto. He looked around one more time and begun walking towards glass door leading to the lobby, closely followed by now calm and strangely tranquil Sasuke.

* * *

"Okay, class. Please gather in front for demonstration and then you'll have some time to practise what we were covering for the last" Naruto checked with the clock on the wall "for the last little over sixty minutes."

Sasuke had to concede that translating Naruto was by far easiest and most comfortable experience of that day. He covered some theory pointing out the most important differences between the palpation the students were used to and the osteopathic approach. For someone so very much alive while gesturing, his speech was coherent and retained order throughout.

Granted, he was telling jokes right and left, but at least they weren't like Jiraiya's – creepy and somewhat perverted, but rather plays on words. Sasuke had been mildly surprised that the man had enough vocabulary to pull off such a stunt. He listened to Naruto enough during lunch to judge his oral prowess to be rather moderate at best, but apparently he was mistaken.

But what Sasuke was grateful the most was that Naruto didn't seem interested in using him as demonstration dummy. He shuddered inwardly at the thought of being poked repeatedly or danced with.

"I need a model for the demonstration," announced Naruto when students gathered in front of his examination table. Sasuke heard snicker or two, and quiet suggestion that Sasuke himself makes pretty good model. He tensed, trying to hide his irritation at the proposal and not letting his gaze wander off the teacher.

To his growing embarrassment Naruto seemed to notice his slight, or so Sasuke hoped, change of demeanour. While Sasuke was fairly certain Naruto didn't understand what the student had said, he was well aware the man did know about Sasuke's previous encounters with Jiraiya and Tsunade, and he seemed to read Sasuke's reaction pretty well.

"Very well, Mr Smart-Ass, come forth," spoke lightly Naruto. "And take off your shirt."

The singled out student did as instructed. To say he wasn't too happy about it would be quite an understatement.

On the other hand Sasuke wasn't sure he felt more content with this subtle display of chivalry or he was pissed at the act. After all he wasn't some damn damsel in distress.

Sensing his own growing uneasiness and irritation Sasuke threw his emotions in the far corner of his head and forced himself to concentrate on whatever was going on at the table.

"As I already said, to relax tense muscle it's not advisable to rub it until it gives up. It won't and the only thing one can accomplish that way is flushed skin from friction." To emphasise his words, Naruto rubbed energetically skin on his model's abdomen. "To help relieve the tension you have to use your brains first and remember that the full relaxation of muscles comes after their full contraction. That's why, to treat patient with painful psoas muscle cramp, we need our patient on his back with bent knees." Naruto positioned his makeshift patient on the table and looked at rest of the student body with mischievous glint in his eyes. "Now the funny, or not so funny for our lovely model here, part – the psoas muscle in located on both sides of the spine in two thirds of the body depth, looking from outer wall of abdomen to outer wall of his back. So, in other words, I need to push my fingers through his abdomen to almost touch his spine."

As Naruto foretold what he will do, he asked his model whether he was ready. With profound satisfaction Sasuke noted the cocky student wasn't so brash anymore. In fact, he looked quite scared after hearing what Naruto intends to do to him.

After receiving shy nod of agreement, Naruto began pushing his palm into students belly with look of fierce concentration on his face. Rest of the students were watching intently as much Naruto's hands as reaction of the model. When Sasuke was under impression the patient will cry out any minute, Naruto looked up from what he was doing with serious face and announced he found the muscle and he's now just barely touching it.

"When you get to the muscle, be sure to check with your patient whether he, or she, will be able to withstand the rest of the treatment." With that said, he looked to the face of his model. Apparently happy with reaction, he continued his narrative. "As I said, the full relaxation comes after full contraction of the muscle, so we press quite strongly on the muscle…"

Everyone in the room could say that Naruto did press his fingers into the muscle as the model groaned softly.

"After few seconds we ask patient to stretch his leg on the side of treatment," as the student swiftly complied, Naruto continued. "And without releasing the compressed muscle, we ask patient to bend his knee again still keeping the pressure." This time around student's groan became louder. "And after that one more round and we release the muscle."

When Naruto finished and took step backwards to allow the student to whisk away, Sasuke clearly saw some grudging regret for the insolent comment.

"Any questions? No? Splendid. Get down practising!"

As the students went to their examination tables and started repeating given instructions, Sasuke followed Naruto back and forth of the room while Naruto helped students with the technique, chatting with them about what they were supposed to do, why and how. He was also telling the more intrigued students some further detail concerning the technique or the muscle or both. That's why Sasuke found himself translating something he wouldn't imagine hearing, let alone speaking, in his wildest dreams.

"Yeah, the psoas muscle is well supplied with oxygenated blood and nutrients hence some weirdo scientists implanted some poor blokes with fertilised egg cells. They thought, or maybe hoped, the muscle could substitute for the uterus. Well, it did for at least three days, I think."

"Uterus?" Asked evidently confused student. He seemed quite deep in thought as he tried to specify. "As in woman's womb?"

"Yep, the same."

"But I don't understand." The other of pair of students chimed in, plainly as lost as his friend. "Why would anyone want to replace uterus with psoas muscle?"

Naruto seemed greatly amused with them. "What is the main, the most basic difference between uterus and psoas muscle?" He answered with sly half smile with playful glint in his eyes.

As the students started to list how the structures are innervated, which vessels transfer the blood, his smile grew wider.

"Very well, you get an A each for your anatomical knowledge." The praised students straightened with pride. "But if you'd answer me that on the exam, you'd still fail." The delight disappeared from their faces and was replaced by puzzlement yet again.

"Do you have psoas muscle in your bodies?" Naruto asked patiently, most apparently waiting for them to get the answer themselves.

Both nodded tentatively.

"And do you have uterus as well?"

From that day onward Sasuke could with all certainty say he saw how the realisation dawns on one's mind. Quite literally.

And then one the students connected the dots and his face distorted with grimace. "They wanted to see if human race can prevail without women to give birth?!"

"Gross," agreed the other student. "It's like one of those MPreg weird fantasies you can see in fanfiction became just a little bit more real."

"MPreg?" Both his practise partner and Naruto were more than a little curious on the topic as they asked in unison and waited with batted breath. Even Sasuke had to admit he did wonder what the hell that strange thing was.

"Yeah, just like they get together two guys, like to have sex, and as they are both male it's quite complicated to knock one up. So yeah, basically MPreg is a story where two guys have sex with each other and one of them gets pregnant."

All four of them shuddered at the explanation. No, Sasuke told his thoughts that seemed to go in very disturbing direction. The whole idea of finding a way for two male characters to have offspring on their own was bothersome. Not mention how the baby would get out? No, thought firmly Sasuke. I'm _so_ not going that direction.

Luckily for him Naruto got his act together quite quickly and was already at another pair of students in need of his assistance. As guiding hands didn't necessarily require any wording, Sasuke had few more moments to regain his composure.

Soon after that the class was finished and Sasuke found himself wondering how more peculiar this day could become.

* * *

"So the technique is simple." Kakashi's soft, somewhat lazy tone drifted through the classroom. "You get your patient on the table, you bend and twist his or her back until you're happy with the position and you make the cracking noise. I'll show you the movements and a moment."

Kakashi, contrary to all of other teachers, was leaning against wall pointing on his presentation with laser pointer. His half-closed eyes seldom looked at the images shown through the projector. He didn't even speak louder for the last rows to hear, possibly expecting students to not make a sound.

The atmosphere in class was sleepy and drowsy, yet the most bored and uninterested seemed Kakashi himself. Thus Sasuke was having difficult time not to doze off or simply loose his concentration. As he swept his gaze through the classroom he saw some of the students fast asleep on their desks and some more getting there as Kakashi's lethargic voice washed over them with indications and contraindications of the technique he was talking about.

Sasuke prevailed and hadn't fallen asleep throughout the lecture, but majority of the audience was just slightly livelier than comatose to say the least. He was sure Kakashi saw the state of his students, yet he didn't turn on more lights or spoke louder. He asked them with soft and quiet voice to come to his own examination table for demonstration. To less observant eye Kakashi might have not seem to care whether his students heard, saw or learned anything in his class, but Sasuke could see that the strange teacher had something up his sleeve. And he was sure the sleeping students won't like it.

The presentation of the technique went rather swiftly with only few questions from gathered students. Not that there was many of them around Kakashi's table to begin with, as the asleep ones hadn't woken up. After making sure everyone knew what they were supposed to do, Kakashi wordlessly communicated with his assistant, Guy, and turned on as many lights as he could with Guy clapping loudly to wake up rest of the students.

Groggily opening their eyes they saw others fast at work practising. Sooner or later all woken up students got to start their practise, yet with no or very little idea what to do. Before long they were regretting falling asleep, as Guy, with his loud, energetic attitude instructed them. In fact, Guy's spirit with showing them what to do left very little room for words, hence Sasuke had no need to be close to the strange man.

Contrary to Kakashi's movements, which were gentle, fluid and adequately soft, Guy's touch was powerful and intensive, leaving students jumpy and shaken. With every mistake made by recently instructed student he was given an incentive to learn faster featuring sit-ups, push-ups and squats. And with every "motivation" dished out, Guy was beaming at them with elation at their "youthful energy and spirit". Soon enough all students who fell asleep during Kakashi's lecture were panting and sweating profusely, muttering promises to self to never fall asleep in class again.

It was Sasuke's turn to snicker at their fate. He decided he liked Kakashi's classes best.

With few minutes left Sasuke saw blond mop of hair coming through the door. Waving in silent greeting to Guy, he made his way to where Sasuke was standing next to Kakashi.

After conversing for a moment in that melodious language Sasuke now knew was Dutch, Naruto turned his attention to Sasuke to inquire about his impression on Kakashi's class.

"It was fine, I guess," came vague answer, which seemed to only amuse Naruto.

"Fine as in Kakashi bored whole class to sleep or fine as in Guy hadn't made you make sit-ups?"

Glancing at Kakashi Sasuke saw he was clearly unfazed with Naruto's accusation. In fact, he seemed fairly pleased.

"Truth to be told, some of the students conquered their drowsiness, but that wasn't due to Kakashi's help. And no, Guy didn't make me do anything, what can't be said for those poor sleepers there."

That appeared to be more truthful than his previous answer and was met with Naruto's wide grin. "I'm surprised some lived it. I remember being the fastest to drop dead in his classes," he mused. "Oh, the amounts of exercise I did in his classes would last regular person a lifetime!"

"I guess I'm losing my touch then," speculated amused Kakashi. "Or you were the most knuckle-headed student I've ever had."

"Yeah, right, keep telling that to yourself, Kakashi," Naruto replied rolling his eyes on his previous teacher. "Um, Sasuke? Would it be inconvenient to you if I'd wait for you downstairs? I just wanted to grab some fresh air after being here all day. I almost feel like a prisoner or something."

"No, of course not. I'll see you…" Sasuke didn't have the opportunity to finish his sentence, as Guy, who apparently dismissed the class already, chimed in.

"You, Naruto, are staying with youthful Sasuke here?!" And before any of them could say anything, Guy pulled Sasuke in tight embrace, ruffling his hair. "What an amazing show of youthful spirit! I, myself, remember the most wondrous time, when Kakashi here stayed with me for a whole week! What fun we had then, do you remember, my eternal rival Kakashi?!"

Right then Sasuke decided to revise his opinion – he liked Kakashi's classes best as long as Guy was at safe distance. Like on the other side of the closed, and preferable locked, door.

Sasuke, to his utmost embarrassment, must have shown his distress, if Naruto's fit of laughing was anything to go by. After recovering from his giggling, Naruto latched his palms on the Guy's hand to make the latter release poor interpreter.

Sasuke was very grateful Naruto helped him get out of Guy's grip and saw that his rescuer now was smirking at his previous teacher's uneasiness. "Yeah, Kakashi, tell us ALL about that week!" Seeing Guy took the bait, Naruto grabbed his bag and Sasuke's hand and pulled him out of classroom, leaving Kakashi to fend for himself.

After running down the stairs, Naruto slowed down not knowing which way they should go now. Sasuke recognised his cue and led them to his car in parking lot, not letting go of Naruto's hand until they reached the vehicle. As his soon to be temporary flatmate was putting his bag and himself into the car Sasuke dimly registered how strong and at the same time how soft and warm Naruto's hand was, and he wondered for a brief moment how would it feel against his cold cheek.

Having internally voices such a thing Sasuke felt his cheeks were no longer as cold as a moment ago. In fact, they weren't cold at all anymore.

Normally Sasuke would calm down and wait for the flush to cease, but he was way too tired to even think about it.

"Are you okay?" asked Naruto with what seemed to be concern. "That reddening from a little jog can't be healthy, you know?"

"I'm fine, the run was nothing. Let's just drive to the apartment." He didn't mean to bark so irritably, but couldn't find any strength to apologise or to rephrase what he'd said.

"Well, sure, but know I'm worried!" exclaimed Naruto indignantly, but thankfully closed his mouth for the entire way home.

All Sasuke wanted now was get home, shower, change his suit to something more comfortable and eat something and maybe, just maybe, revise some vocabulary for the next day.

Being as tired as he was now, he couldn't muster any energy to entertain his guest, so Sasuke just drove silently until they reached his estate.

"Welcome to my home, Naruto," said Sasuke with what he hoped was polite hospitability while opening his door for the man. He didn't house guests very often. Actually, as he thought about it, he never did. He then led the man to Sasuke's spare bedroom currently transformed into his library and study of sorts.

"You'll be sleeping here, if it's to your liking. Please, do feel at home here and make yourself comfortable." Said Sasuke gathering papers spread on his desk into one, neat pile. "The kitchen is across the hall and the glasses are in cupboard over the sink. I'll be with you in few minutes. I just need to change my clothes." And without further loitering in the blonds vicinity, Sasuke left the room.

"Um, thanks, Sasuke, this room looks really cool! Actually the whole place screams awesome!" shouted after him Naruto, who seemed regaining his energy in rapid pace.

Once in his own bedroom Sasuke started to undress himself heading for the shower. He stopped dead in his tracks as strange thought crossed his mind: maybe Naruto's staying here won't be as unpleasant as I thought.

Furrowing his brow at the bizarre sentiment Sasuke used what little energy he had left to get his act together as he headed straight for the fast shower determined to not dwell on his tired brain musings.

* * *

_A/N: I, RoyalApple, thank you for your time to read this and encourage you to leave me a comment. I sure hope you all enjoyed this chapter and will be back for next instalment!_

_See you next time!_

_RA_


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